PICTURE MEME THINGER: (Stolen from
golgibody )
• Post ten of any pictures currently on your hard drive that you think are self-expressive.
• NO CAPTIONS! It must be like we're speaking with images and we have to interpret your visual language just like we have to interpret your words.
• They must ALREADY be on your hard drive - no googling or flickr! They have to have been saved to your folders sometime in the past. They must be something you've saved there because it resonated with you for some reason.
• You do NOT have to answer any questions about any of your pictures if you don't want to. You can make them as mysterious as you like. Or you can explain them away as much as you like.










• Post ten of any pictures currently on your hard drive that you think are self-expressive.
• NO CAPTIONS! It must be like we're speaking with images and we have to interpret your visual language just like we have to interpret your words.
• They must ALREADY be on your hard drive - no googling or flickr! They have to have been saved to your folders sometime in the past. They must be something you've saved there because it resonated with you for some reason.
• You do NOT have to answer any questions about any of your pictures if you don't want to. You can make them as mysterious as you like. Or you can explain them away as much as you like.
- Location:WORK
- Mood:
Dead - Music:Stars
This week has practically been a seesaw mood-wise.
It began all right, but 'round about Tuesday, I began thinking about school. I feel like I don't fit in with the theatre group, to the point where I'm not even going to major anymore. Which has thrown me off a bit, since I've wanted to do theatre since I was about four.
It didn't help that Tuesday evening, Dean Lawler called me and asked if I wanted to appeal the school's decision to refuse my return in the fall. This is something that I'd had no idea about until she called. Of course I want to appeal their decision! But I haven't even told my mom that I've failed two of my classes.
So all that shook me up. I've got to write some sort of essay telling the committee why I ought to be allowed back. It's due July 5.
That was my low, and my week flipped last night when I got to see Eric again. (Ooh, that reminds me to post pictures...he's got a really cute nose, so I forced him to let me take a profile shot of him. Just so I can show it off.) I was expecting to get home around midnight, but my ride decided to go to someone else's house and play D&D until 4:45 AM. Not a general problem for me, since I got all-night snuggles (instrumental in me cheering up), but my darling mother was expecting me home. I ended up getting home around 7 AM. And skipping work in favor of sleep.
I might see Eric again this weekend, which would be lovely. I can be my usual crazy self around him, which is wonderful, and nice for a change. He asked me to go to Lake Compounce with him on the 29th; I'm looking forward to it =]
Oh, and he called me on his break from work today. -glee- Just to say "hi." He said he'd call later tonight.
Anyway, long and sappy entry is long and sappy, and I'm bringing my umbrella with me to avoid all the wet sponges you'll throw at me.
ICE CREAM IS IN STORE!
Cheers~
P.S. NOSE

It began all right, but 'round about Tuesday, I began thinking about school. I feel like I don't fit in with the theatre group, to the point where I'm not even going to major anymore. Which has thrown me off a bit, since I've wanted to do theatre since I was about four.
It didn't help that Tuesday evening, Dean Lawler called me and asked if I wanted to appeal the school's decision to refuse my return in the fall. This is something that I'd had no idea about until she called. Of course I want to appeal their decision! But I haven't even told my mom that I've failed two of my classes.
So all that shook me up. I've got to write some sort of essay telling the committee why I ought to be allowed back. It's due July 5.
That was my low, and my week flipped last night when I got to see Eric again. (Ooh, that reminds me to post pictures...he's got a really cute nose, so I forced him to let me take a profile shot of him. Just so I can show it off.) I was expecting to get home around midnight, but my ride decided to go to someone else's house and play D&D until 4:45 AM. Not a general problem for me, since I got all-night snuggles (instrumental in me cheering up), but my darling mother was expecting me home. I ended up getting home around 7 AM. And skipping work in favor of sleep.
I might see Eric again this weekend, which would be lovely. I can be my usual crazy self around him, which is wonderful, and nice for a change. He asked me to go to Lake Compounce with him on the 29th; I'm looking forward to it =]
Oh, and he called me on his break from work today. -glee- Just to say "hi." He said he'd call later tonight.
Anyway, long and sappy entry is long and sappy, and I'm bringing my umbrella with me to avoid all the wet sponges you'll throw at me.
ICE CREAM IS IN STORE!
Cheers~
P.S. NOSE
- Mood:
cheerful - Music:Kathy's Song - Apoptygma Berzerk
Oh goodness.
For those of you who haven't heard me rant at great length about my new pal Code, PLUG YOUR EARS.
Now, I'm not a fan of talking to / befriending random scary people from the internet, but I have made an exception. On the grounds that I met him via PostSecret. And he's English. We've been videochatting on MSN.
This probably has "bad" written all over it, but it's not like I'm going to go visit him, right? Right? . . .
Anyway, HE SOUNDS LIKE NERIMON. Right, had to get that out. But cooler, because he is actually talking to me!!! >_< Oh gosh, fangirl'd. And yes, the first time we spoke, I squealed like an idiot. Well done.
No need for real concern, though, of course. But he's a real sweetheart.
And hey, he's cute, right? And not just English?
- Mood:
satisfied - Music:Nuits de Reve - Moxy Fruvous
I find this to be an interesting question - everyone's always complaining that the other sex has it way easier, or whatever. But I think we each have our own difficulties.
Things that suck about being a girl:
1. Childbirth. This is an obvious one. Clearly very painful.
2. Social pressure. Girls can be ruthless to each other, and it can be really tough to fit in.
3. Clothing. This fits in with social pressure. Fashion is a lot more difficult for girls than for boys.
4. Large breasts. I've never had to cope with this, but apparently having huge knockers isn't the best thing in the world. Sorry, guys!
5. Dealing with boys. We don't understand you, either.
Things that suck about being a boy:
1. Penises. Everyone knows when you think someone's attractive.
2. Balls. Apparently it hurts to be kicked in them.
3. Manliness. If you're not tough enough, people will tease you and call you gay.
4. Sports. See manliness.
5. Dealing with girls. Yeah, yeah, okay, you don't understand us. We get it.
In the end, I think it's pretty clear that nobody has it easy. But hey, that shouldn't keep us from getting along! (Except that boys have cooties.)
Things that suck about being a girl:
1. Childbirth. This is an obvious one. Clearly very painful.
2. Social pressure. Girls can be ruthless to each other, and it can be really tough to fit in.
3. Clothing. This fits in with social pressure. Fashion is a lot more difficult for girls than for boys.
4. Large breasts. I've never had to cope with this, but apparently having huge knockers isn't the best thing in the world. Sorry, guys!
5. Dealing with boys. We don't understand you, either.
Things that suck about being a boy:
1. Penises. Everyone knows when you think someone's attractive.
2. Balls. Apparently it hurts to be kicked in them.
3. Manliness. If you're not tough enough, people will tease you and call you gay.
4. Sports. See manliness.
5. Dealing with girls. Yeah, yeah, okay, you don't understand us. We get it.
In the end, I think it's pretty clear that nobody has it easy. But hey, that shouldn't keep us from getting along! (Except that boys have cooties.)
- Mood:
drained
Hey, all.
Nothing too interesting going on over on my end, but I'm quite bored and I haven't updated in a while, so I thought I might as well post.
Life's been going all right, which is nice. Yesterday was gorgeous, and I spent a good portion of it outside =] Broke out my guitar and sat around being a hippie. Which isn't a bad thing by any measure. I'm sure the people on the lawn were annoyed that I kept playing the same songs over and over again ;)
Oh, and I bought a beautiful new dress! I definitely shouldn't have, despite the fact that it looks wonderful on me and fits amazingly. It was much too expensive. LIVE WITHIN YOUR MEANS!
On the schedule for today: Get dressed, go to auditions for 9th and Madison, eat some food(?), go to improv, go to rehearsal, eat dinner, homework(?).
I want to watch more Doctor Who.
All right, time to go! ALLONS-Y!
Nothing too interesting going on over on my end, but I'm quite bored and I haven't updated in a while, so I thought I might as well post.
Life's been going all right, which is nice. Yesterday was gorgeous, and I spent a good portion of it outside =] Broke out my guitar and sat around being a hippie. Which isn't a bad thing by any measure. I'm sure the people on the lawn were annoyed that I kept playing the same songs over and over again ;)
Oh, and I bought a beautiful new dress! I definitely shouldn't have, despite the fact that it looks wonderful on me and fits amazingly. It was much too expensive. LIVE WITHIN YOUR MEANS!
On the schedule for today: Get dressed, go to auditions for 9th and Madison, eat some food(?), go to improv, go to rehearsal, eat dinner, homework(?).
I want to watch more Doctor Who.
All right, time to go! ALLONS-Y!
- Location:DORM
- Music:Good Charlotte (DON'T JUDGE ME)
FUCK.
- Mood:
>_
A few years ago, I like to think that I looked a lot like Avril Lavigne (remember her?) Maybe because I was more "punk."

I've also heard that I look like Keira Knightley, though I'm not really sure about that one anymore.

If anyone looks like Keira Knightley, it's Natalie Portman, dontcha think?
According to one of those celebrity matchy websites, I look like Madonna, Billie Piper, Celine Dion, Grace Kelley, Brad Pitt (?), ETC.
Like
thefoolshope said, I guess the only real course of action is to become famous myself.

I've also heard that I look like Keira Knightley, though I'm not really sure about that one anymore.

If anyone looks like Keira Knightley, it's Natalie Portman, dontcha think?
According to one of those celebrity matchy websites, I look like Madonna, Billie Piper, Celine Dion, Grace Kelley, Brad Pitt (?), ETC.
Like
- Location:HOME
- Mood:
okay - Music:MYTHBUSTERS
Lindsay is feeding my newfound fangirlism.
Not that i haven't been a fangirl before. Just what i'm fangirling over is newfound...erm...yes.
AT ANY RATE.
So in the past year, i've gotten into Doctor Who, and that's completely thanks to Lindsay. My first is 9, but 10 is much sexier. Much to my dismay. Sort of.
Dear lord, David Tennant! You ridiculous man, you! GAHHHH!
It's unfortunate how much I'm fangirling over this. Really. Obscene, almost. Well, i don't think it's quite gotten to that point. Yet.
When i start putting pictures on my wall, that's when it starts. Oh shit, now i'm compelled to...FRICK.
I've got to get a folder on my computer to house (well, folder) all the pictures i'm about to save. This is awful. Have you seen my desktop? I blame Lindsay.

....................
Not that i haven't been a fangirl before. Just what i'm fangirling over is newfound...erm...yes.
AT ANY RATE.
So in the past year, i've gotten into Doctor Who, and that's completely thanks to Lindsay. My first is 9, but 10 is much sexier. Much to my dismay. Sort of.
Dear lord, David Tennant! You ridiculous man, you! GAHHHH!
It's unfortunate how much I'm fangirling over this. Really. Obscene, almost. Well, i don't think it's quite gotten to that point. Yet.
When i start putting pictures on my wall, that's when it starts. Oh shit, now i'm compelled to...FRICK.
I've got to get a folder on my computer to house (well, folder) all the pictures i'm about to save. This is awful. Have you seen my desktop? I blame Lindsay.

....................
- Location:Dorm
- Mood:
fangirly - Music:Beauty and the Beast - Belle
recently getting much enjoyment out of xkcd's version of "googlewhacking."
seriously, try it out. it's lots of fun.
enter a phrase in google's search box (in quotes) and see how many results you can get. the fewer above zero, the better.
for the record,
i want to have sex with randall munroe.
^there's another result for you.
seriously, try it out. it's lots of fun.
enter a phrase in google's search box (in quotes) and see how many results you can get. the fewer above zero, the better.
for the record,
i want to have sex with randall munroe.
^there's another result for you.
So this thursday (yesterday, that was) I woke up with a nasty sore throat. Ended up not going in to work, thank goodness. So I've been stuck at home, with no television or internet until after dinner (thanks, mom and dad). I was invited to see Hancock with friends, but I ended up falling asleep on the couch instead. Unfortunately, sleeping most of the day does not make for a good night's rest. Last night was probably the worst night of sleep I've had in quite some time.
So now my throat's feeling a little better, and I'm stuck at my mom's office waiting for a ride home.
Get well wishes and consolation are welcomed.
So now my throat's feeling a little better, and I'm stuck at my mom's office waiting for a ride home.
Get well wishes and consolation are welcomed.
- Location:Mom's office
- Mood:
listless
so i totally truthed you guys when i said this LJ would never be updated. last time i posted was something ridiculous like 63 weeks ago. all the stuff before this post is all ancient and archaic. and redundant. aaaanyway, for anyone who reads this, i really still don't know how often this is going to be updated, since most of my posts are in the community
t_shirt_surgery, and i don't post here since i'm terrible at journaling...which you may have noticed.
anyway, i love
golgibody, who is my new friend from PA. and she gets a shoutout because she's just that special.
PEACE.
anyway, i love
PEACE.
- Location:home
- Mood:
pleased - Music:Lynryd Skynyrd - Sweet Home Alabama
So prom is May 20th this year...I'm pretty psyched. I have my dress and shoes all picked out already...my dress is in the mail right now--it should be here by Monday at the latest. The shoes I'll probably get this weekend when I go home. HOME!
Pretty much. I'll be downloading all weekend. Finally! And I hope I can get some sort of gift card so I can buy things from the internet. Because, unfortunately, I don't have a credit card. And I want to order stuff that I know my mom won't pay for. Not that kind of stuff, silly! Vampire fangs and the like. They are AWESOME!
[my dress and shoes]

[the fangs!]

you should check out the site where I'm planning on getting the fangs! [here]
Oh, and I asked someone to the prom! I have no idea how it's gonna pan out, but either way, I'll be cool with it. Did i mention he's the roommate of the guy i kissed 2 nights ago? heh... n.n;;
anyway, I gotta jet to class now. What's on the menu this afternoon/evening? Let's see...homework, tennis, dinner, voice lesson, study hall, free time.
Catch ya later <3
Pretty much. I'll be downloading all weekend. Finally! And I hope I can get some sort of gift card so I can buy things from the internet. Because, unfortunately, I don't have a credit card. And I want to order stuff that I know my mom won't pay for. Not that kind of stuff, silly! Vampire fangs and the like. They are AWESOME!
[my dress and shoes]

[the fangs!]

you should check out the site where I'm planning on getting the fangs! [here]
Oh, and I asked someone to the prom! I have no idea how it's gonna pan out, but either way, I'll be cool with it. Did i mention he's the roommate of the guy i kissed 2 nights ago? heh... n.n;;
anyway, I gotta jet to class now. What's on the menu this afternoon/evening? Let's see...homework, tennis, dinner, voice lesson, study hall, free time.
Catch ya later <3
- Location:Chase's room
- Mood:
optimistic - Music:Sex and Candy
- Mood:
mellow
This whole thing is stressing me out sooo much.
I'm feeling pretty freakin' hated right now--my friends make fun of me, think i'm a bitch, etc. i wanna stab Chris multiple times (i mean upwards of seven). Alicia hates me. Chase doesn't think i made the right decision *after all* about katie (hellooo, flip flopping, much?!?) and i feel generally sick. i thought all this would have blown over by now. no such luck, apparently. i mean, okay, i *do* feel a little bit superior to them, but is it really that big a deal? i only feel superior because i'm the most mature out of my entire group of friends here. gosh, that sounds egotistical. but it's true, y'know? i'm just on a different level. and i feel so alone. and like i'm gonna throw up.
my grades are slipping. i haven't been doing my homework. i'm missing SAT prep and voice lessons...i've been distracting myself with movies and books to keep myself from thinking about my problems (not the best solution, i know, but it's going to have to do for now).
----on another note completely, margaret unblocked the update part of LJ *thank god* so i can make posts pretty and such now. =)
mrs. keator just emailed me.. she asked why i missed my voice lesson. my response was a slightly shorter version of what i said above.
my computer's in chase's room. so here i am sitting on her bed, while she presumably thinks i'm a bitch most of the time and that i think i'm superior to everyone (in all honesty, i checked.) i wanna go back to my room and just sleep. that's another way i escape stress. >.< again, it's not the best way to deal with it. i have an essay due whenever i can get it finished...i have reading to do, and a write-up for that...i have math homework...i gotta write a grammar lesson...and i'm positive i'm forgett--oh yeah, something about nationalism and primitivism in music? i have no idea what that's supposed to mean, and i'm not sure where i can find that info.
i need an escape.
I'm feeling pretty freakin' hated right now--my friends make fun of me, think i'm a bitch, etc. i wanna stab Chris multiple times (i mean upwards of seven). Alicia hates me. Chase doesn't think i made the right decision *after all* about katie (hellooo, flip flopping, much?!?) and i feel generally sick. i thought all this would have blown over by now. no such luck, apparently. i mean, okay, i *do* feel a little bit superior to them, but is it really that big a deal? i only feel superior because i'm the most mature out of my entire group of friends here. gosh, that sounds egotistical. but it's true, y'know? i'm just on a different level. and i feel so alone. and like i'm gonna throw up.
my grades are slipping. i haven't been doing my homework. i'm missing SAT prep and voice lessons...i've been distracting myself with movies and books to keep myself from thinking about my problems (not the best solution, i know, but it's going to have to do for now).
----on another note completely, margaret unblocked the update part of LJ *thank god* so i can make posts pretty and such now. =)
mrs. keator just emailed me.. she asked why i missed my voice lesson. my response was a slightly shorter version of what i said above.
my computer's in chase's room. so here i am sitting on her bed, while she presumably thinks i'm a bitch most of the time and that i think i'm superior to everyone (in all honesty, i checked.) i wanna go back to my room and just sleep. that's another way i escape stress. >.< again, it's not the best way to deal with it. i have an essay due whenever i can get it finished...i have reading to do, and a write-up for that...i have math homework...i gotta write a grammar lesson...and i'm positive i'm forgett--oh yeah, something about nationalism and primitivism in music? i have no idea what that's supposed to mean, and i'm not sure where i can find that info.
i need an escape.
- Mood:
distressed
So here's the deal. Last night, Katie, my suitemate, had a boy in her room. Which is against the rules. Especially because the boy she had in her room was a former student here, Ben, who got kicked out for dealing and wasn't even supposed to be on campus. So anyway, I was sitting in the upstairs common room, and watched Ben walk by. I distinctly remember saying to him, "You know you're not supposed to be up here, right?" Everyone shushed me and told me to be quiet. I was like, "Whatever." I asked various people who were also in the common room if it would be a "bitch thing" to do if I ratted her out. They all (including the dorm leader Alicia) agreed that it would, and asked why I would do that. I was like, "Uh..because it's the right thing to do?" I don't even know. So when our houseparent Ms. Marini came up to tell everyone to go back to their rooms, I motioned her aside and told her that Katie had a boy in her room. I also mentioned that dorm leader Alicia had told me not to tell. Ms. Marini knocked on Katie's door and outed Ben...I scurried into my room. Mr. McKenna, the Dean, came to our dorm and I don't really know what happened after that, but I do know that Katie's in danger of not graduating and Ben's to be arrested if he's seen on campus again.
I think it was the right thing to do to tell on Katie, but unfortunately, a large amount of girls in my dorm disagree. They spent quite some time in her room comforting her and telling her what a bitch I was. For doing the right thing? Alicia wasn't fulfilling her duties as a student leader by upholding the rules. I don't know what I should have done. Scruples indeed.
I just had to get this out before class...it's been bothering me all day, and I just don't know. At least I still have a few friends. Chase, Chrissy and Emily are lifesavers. <3
On a different note, I still gotta get those songs from Chrissy. "Date Rape," "Hear You Me," and a bunch of Hello Goodbye shit.
Pretty much. Here's to avoiding everyone in my dorm. Cheers.
I think it was the right thing to do to tell on Katie, but unfortunately, a large amount of girls in my dorm disagree. They spent quite some time in her room comforting her and telling her what a bitch I was. For doing the right thing? Alicia wasn't fulfilling her duties as a student leader by upholding the rules. I don't know what I should have done. Scruples indeed.
I just had to get this out before class...it's been bothering me all day, and I just don't know. At least I still have a few friends. Chase, Chrissy and Emily are lifesavers. <3
On a different note, I still gotta get those songs from Chrissy. "Date Rape," "Hear You Me," and a bunch of Hello Goodbye shit.
Pretty much. Here's to avoiding everyone in my dorm. Cheers.
- Mood:
drained
“Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me!”
Sophia’s backpack had split its seams and textbooks, papers, and notecards had spilled all over the floor. She scrambled to pick them up as the stampede of students barely parted to avoid stepping on her. Nearly as invisible as always, she thought. She managed to salvage the majority of her papers, but some had been kicked off down the hallway by unsuspecting feet. Who knew where they’d gone to? Putting on her now mostly useless backpack and carrying way too many books in her arms, Sophia trudged down the hallway to class.
The bell rang as she was seconds from the door of her math class. Sophia, still juggling her textbooks and various papers, managed to nudge the handle enough so that she could open the door with her body. Having accomplished this, it was only a matter of finding an empty seat without dropping her books again. Easier said than done. The class watched her plight in silence like a horde of hungry crocodiles watches the last monkey in a tree. Their eyes followed her every movement: if she swayed to the left unbalanced, their eyes tracked her. Sophia had progressed thorough at least six shades of crimson so far. And didn’t the only empty seat just have to be on the opposite side of the room? Time seemed to freeze as she walked to the seat. Finally, which showed, to her, that there must be a god, Sophia made it to her seat and slid into it. The time that had, for those agonizing (was it only thirty?) seconds, been absolutely frozen, began to thaw and the students began talking again. Sophia’s ears, which had boiled as she walked across the room slowly cooled and began to return to their usual shade of not red.
She stood her backpack up next to her chair, and it drooped pathetically forward. Sighing, Sophia took her math book from the stack she had placed next to her desk and placed it in front of her next to her notebook. She looked up at the teacher, Mr. Rosen, for further direction. Why he hadn’t done anything to save her from such embarrassment was anybody’s guess. He smiled, his perfect teeth shining like two rows of white corn.
“If we are completely settled,” he said, “I would like to begin class. I have written the date and vocabulary words on board—you know what to do.”
Sophia did, and obediently copied everything into her notebook, which had a dusty footprint on the cover now. The sound of scratching pencils on paper soothed her. Sophia kept half of her attention on what Mr. Rosen was saying—he had continued with the lesson—and let her mind wander. She was fairly good at this by now; she did it in all of her classes and was able to take notes while her mind was elsewhere.
Footprints…She thought about the footprints the seagulls left on the beach when she was at the Jersey Shore that past summer. She loved how the waves washed over the footprints and left a completely new slate for more. There was something existential about all that, she thought, something about the impermanence of life or something. She’d figure it out later. Scritch, scritch. Sophia had never seen a dead seagull. Where did they go to die? On the sea, perhaps? Or in the air? Do they die on the beach and the tide washes them away? Scritch. Seagulls are dumb anyway.
“Sophia, what’s the answer to this question?” Mr. Rosen asked, clearly trying to catch her off guard.
Sophia looked up. On the board was written
12x2 – 2x – 2
No sweat.
“Six X plus two multiplied by two X minus one.” That should show him, she tacked on mentally.
“Very good, Sophia,” he nodded, smiling at her in a way that made her feel satisfied with her work, yet slightly uncomfortable. He copied her answer on to the board. Sophia blushed and returned to her thoughts.
* * *
The bell rang, and Sophia got together her books. As she stood and waked over to the door, Mr. Rosen stopped her.
“May I speak with you a moment, Sophia?”
“Yeah, sure, what is it?” she replied. It’s probably about me being late, she thought.
“You were late today, Sophia.” It wasn’t a question, but Sophia nodded.
“I’m sorry, my backpack broke.”
“That’s okay, Sophia. Unforeseeable circumstances. I understand.” He paused, and smiled at her, those perfect teeth gleaming second only to his eyes, which were locked on hers. Sophia could not keep his gaze and looked at the ground. He continued. “You know you’re one of my best students, Sophia. You’re very smart. And very pretty.” He put his hand under her chin, forcing her to look back into his eyes.
“I—I have to go to class.” Sophia turned away, blushing. She could feel her ears turn scarlet on either side of her head. Her notebook fell to the floor, she was shaking so much. Bending down and trying not to let her books fall, Sophia picked up her notebook. But before she could stand up again, she felt warm breath and stubble on her neck and heard a voice in her ear.
“Very, very pretty, Sophia.”
She got to her feet as fast as she could and bolted out the door.
Sophia’s backpack had split its seams and textbooks, papers, and notecards had spilled all over the floor. She scrambled to pick them up as the stampede of students barely parted to avoid stepping on her. Nearly as invisible as always, she thought. She managed to salvage the majority of her papers, but some had been kicked off down the hallway by unsuspecting feet. Who knew where they’d gone to? Putting on her now mostly useless backpack and carrying way too many books in her arms, Sophia trudged down the hallway to class.
The bell rang as she was seconds from the door of her math class. Sophia, still juggling her textbooks and various papers, managed to nudge the handle enough so that she could open the door with her body. Having accomplished this, it was only a matter of finding an empty seat without dropping her books again. Easier said than done. The class watched her plight in silence like a horde of hungry crocodiles watches the last monkey in a tree. Their eyes followed her every movement: if she swayed to the left unbalanced, their eyes tracked her. Sophia had progressed thorough at least six shades of crimson so far. And didn’t the only empty seat just have to be on the opposite side of the room? Time seemed to freeze as she walked to the seat. Finally, which showed, to her, that there must be a god, Sophia made it to her seat and slid into it. The time that had, for those agonizing (was it only thirty?) seconds, been absolutely frozen, began to thaw and the students began talking again. Sophia’s ears, which had boiled as she walked across the room slowly cooled and began to return to their usual shade of not red.
She stood her backpack up next to her chair, and it drooped pathetically forward. Sighing, Sophia took her math book from the stack she had placed next to her desk and placed it in front of her next to her notebook. She looked up at the teacher, Mr. Rosen, for further direction. Why he hadn’t done anything to save her from such embarrassment was anybody’s guess. He smiled, his perfect teeth shining like two rows of white corn.
“If we are completely settled,” he said, “I would like to begin class. I have written the date and vocabulary words on board—you know what to do.”
Sophia did, and obediently copied everything into her notebook, which had a dusty footprint on the cover now. The sound of scratching pencils on paper soothed her. Sophia kept half of her attention on what Mr. Rosen was saying—he had continued with the lesson—and let her mind wander. She was fairly good at this by now; she did it in all of her classes and was able to take notes while her mind was elsewhere.
Footprints…She thought about the footprints the seagulls left on the beach when she was at the Jersey Shore that past summer. She loved how the waves washed over the footprints and left a completely new slate for more. There was something existential about all that, she thought, something about the impermanence of life or something. She’d figure it out later. Scritch, scritch. Sophia had never seen a dead seagull. Where did they go to die? On the sea, perhaps? Or in the air? Do they die on the beach and the tide washes them away? Scritch. Seagulls are dumb anyway.
“Sophia, what’s the answer to this question?” Mr. Rosen asked, clearly trying to catch her off guard.
Sophia looked up. On the board was written
12x2 – 2x – 2
No sweat.
“Six X plus two multiplied by two X minus one.” That should show him, she tacked on mentally.
“Very good, Sophia,” he nodded, smiling at her in a way that made her feel satisfied with her work, yet slightly uncomfortable. He copied her answer on to the board. Sophia blushed and returned to her thoughts.
* * *
The bell rang, and Sophia got together her books. As she stood and waked over to the door, Mr. Rosen stopped her.
“May I speak with you a moment, Sophia?”
“Yeah, sure, what is it?” she replied. It’s probably about me being late, she thought.
“You were late today, Sophia.” It wasn’t a question, but Sophia nodded.
“I’m sorry, my backpack broke.”
“That’s okay, Sophia. Unforeseeable circumstances. I understand.” He paused, and smiled at her, those perfect teeth gleaming second only to his eyes, which were locked on hers. Sophia could not keep his gaze and looked at the ground. He continued. “You know you’re one of my best students, Sophia. You’re very smart. And very pretty.” He put his hand under her chin, forcing her to look back into his eyes.
“I—I have to go to class.” Sophia turned away, blushing. She could feel her ears turn scarlet on either side of her head. Her notebook fell to the floor, she was shaking so much. Bending down and trying not to let her books fall, Sophia picked up her notebook. But before she could stand up again, she felt warm breath and stubble on her neck and heard a voice in her ear.
“Very, very pretty, Sophia.”
She got to her feet as fast as she could and bolted out the door.
- Mood:
mellow - Music:Light My Candle - RENT
